There are so many stereotypes, so many sayings, so many stories… all about women trying to find the right man. From dating disasters to average tales about lack of chemistry, every woman has her share of war stories. Sometimes it’s as simple as not feeling a spark despite someone being perfect on paper. While disappointing, this is nothing compared to finding yourself wondering why your dream guy decided to never call you again.
We’ve met many women who have been let down by the ending of their relationship. They are perplexed as to what happened. They feel alone, left with so many unanswered questions. “I am always so caring, why did he leave me?” or “I am beautiful and take care of myself. Why would he want her?” And while both of those statements may be true, they may be failing to consider what matters to men in a relationship. So what are men looking for in a mate? Of course, every person is unique and no two men are alike. However, there are some clear commonalities amongst many people of the same sex.
First off, men like their independence! This does not mean that a man should be free to disrespect you and your needs, nor is it implying that he should be allowed to flirt with any woman he chooses. However, women need to respect that men need alone time. Whether your man is dedicated to a hobby, or just needs time to spend on his own or with friends, a little space and breathing room is a must in any relationship. Outside interests are healthy. Avoid jealousy and feeling as though you are being replaced by these interests. On the contrary, a bit of freedom leads to a stronger and healthier relationship.
Moreover, it is very important to understand that most men want to feel masculine! Men enjoy feeling “needed”. Historically, men were the providers and “rock” of the family. Although gender roles are no longer as prevalent, and women are recognized as being just as capable as men, men still desire a woman who makes them feel strong and appreciated. Even if you are a confident career woman, don’t stop acknowledging your man’s desire to feel needed. And whether you realize it or not, he is needed; we all benefit from the love and support of our partners. Isn’t that why we are in relationships? Shared desires and needs?
Lastly, whether we like it or not, men look for beautiful women. However, beauty is not just a product of personal appearance. Every single woman in the world can be beautiful. Beauty is within everyone. The trick is finding a way to express your own personal beauty as a part of your personality. You just need to believe in yourself and stop comparing yourself to other women. You have no need to feel inadequate, and doing so will stop you from being the beautiful, confident woman that you are! Think of the celebrities you’ve seen that have made millions but do not have a classic appearance. They do have confidence, and it’s magnetic. If you start to believe in yourself and feel confident in your beauty, you will not only ACT beautiful, you will BECOME beautiful, and everyone around you will be able to notice that, including your man.
Keep in mind that a relationship is never supposed to be one-sided. While you might make many efforts to try and please your man, always make sure that you are not wasting your time on a man who does not deserve you. Notice whether he is putting forth the same effort to please you. So many women are willing to change their habits and, in some cases, even their looks in order to please the men they love. Hopefully, you are sacrificing for a man who is also willing to make sacrifices for you. Love is never one-sided, and you deserve someone who is equally invested in your relationship. Relationships require communication and mutual respect. If you are willing to go to such great lengths in order to form a lasting union, wouldn’t you feel undervalued if your man spent his time sitting on his sofa, expecting you to do all the work? You should be wary of man who expects too much from you without giving anything in return. Move on if your relationship lacks mutual respect. A good relationship requires two people working towards a similar goal.